We are on the cusp of the third quarter of the year, my friend! Do you remember what your New Year’s goals were? How’s it going for you? Have you even given yourself the permission to set just one big, dreamy goal to work towards?
As a 61-year-old woman, my life has never felt more successful than it does now.I think of myself as an extremely successful person, and I see evidence of this everywhere I look. It fuels and motivates me towards even more success, and I know I can accomplish literally any goal I set. And this week, I want to remind you that you can do the exact same thing because I’ve had some revelations about the secret to success.
Join me on the podcast this week as I share my discoveries about the three keys to living a successful, happy life. You’ll hear what my personal keys to success are, why yours will be unique to you, and how to examine what will have you showing up every day excited and inspired to go after something different in the second half of life.
If you want to make 2022 a year to remember, you have to work with me! You can sign up for a free coaching session by clicking here. Coaching spots for July of this year are open, so join us if you want to be a different person showing up to your life in a completely new way.
WHAT YOU’LL DISCOVER IN THIS EPISODE:
One sure way to reach your goals.
My 3 keys to living a successful, happy life.
Why your recipe for success will be unique to you.
The only obstacle to the life and self-concept you want.
How to begin imagining something different for yourself in the second half of life.
LISTEN TO THE FULL EPISODE:
FEATURED ON THE SHOW:
Interested in working with me? Click here to find out more.
I am Kym Showers, and this is Reinvented After 40, episode number 42: The Key to Success.
Hey, friends. Welcome to Reinvented After 40, a podcast for all you women in the second half of life who are ready to take responsibility for your own wellbeing and create a life you love living.
I’m your host, Kym Showers, and after spending the first 40 years of my life people-pleasing and following all the rules, I was exhausted and ready for a change. I reinvented myself. I stopped outsourcing my happiness. And I’ve been brave enough to live a different kind of life.
I’ll be here each week to help you do the same thing. It’s gonna be fun. Let’s go.
Hey, everyone, how are you today? Welcome back to the show, episode number 42. The key to success, I love this episode. I’m so excited to share with you a couple of ideas that just came to me this week about success. I feel like I kind of understand it because I feel very successful. I think about my life as a very successful life. And I think about myself as a 61 year old woman as extremely successful. And I hope you can look at your life and think the same kind of thoughts about yourself and about your life so far in this way.
It’s a very good feeling when you think this way and you believe your thoughts. And those feelings will motivate you towards more success, that’s how it works. So welcome back to the show. We are talking about success today because we are officially halfway through 2022. You might be listening to this, this episode comes out on the last day of June 2022. So tomorrow morning we will wake up to the third quarter of the year.
Do you remember what your goals were on January 1st or your one goal that you set for yourself, the big dream that you decided that you were going to accomplish this year? How are you doing on that? How’s it going for you? I love to know I can restart every single day. I want to give you permission to just start again today and know that you can accomplish any single thing that you want to in the second half of 2022.
By December you can, and you will reach your goals if you commit to whatever they are or whatever it is, you just commit to it right now and just say, “No matter what I am going to do today, take action today and then I’m going to wake up tomorrow and take action tomorrow. And then the next day after that, and the next day after that until December 31st when I reach my goal. And then the new year starts, and the new goal begins. That’s what I do. I just take a little bit of action every single day and I never take my eye off my goal.
And I want to remind you that you can do the exact same thing. And I want to also tell you if you’ve never been coached, coaching is the way to reach your goal, I promise you, it is. So, it’s the one sure way to reach whatever goals you have in mind, coaching will be the tool, coaching will be the instrument. You will get every single thing that you can imagine in your mind when you invest in yourself, and you commit to coaching. That’s why I’m here.
Okay, so what I want to share with you today is the key to success. And this came to me this week because my husband, Jeff, who we all know and love, he’s everyone’s favorite person. He’s my favorite person. He came into my room a couple of days ago and he told me that he just finished his 19th book this year. So, he is a voracious reader. And when I say reader, I mean old fashioned reader. Well, maybe not old fashioned, sometimes he gets paper books, old fashioned paper books but he does have a kindle and he reads a lot on his kindle. But he is a really, really fast reader.
And when I say I’m reading a book most of the time I mean I’m actually listening on audio to a book now. I used to read old fashioned ways with the books. I had a library of books that I no longer have. But he literally reads. He sits in his chair every day and I know it’s just – he has a different mindset than I do. He has a different brain than I do. He’s actually so smart, he’s such a genius. And he just has a way of getting things done really quick. He can focus his brain and he gets his work done so quick. He really amazes me and I’m so proud of him for that.
And I’m kind of in awe of him and he has taught me so much about that kind of thinking and the power of our brain. But you guys, he has read 19 books so far this year, halfway through the year. So that means by the end of this year he probably will be close to 40 books for the year where I’m probably going to be five books for the year and just listening to them probably. But we’re so different. But anyways, back to the key to success and the thing that he told me, the three things that he told me that I was like, “Oh, my gosh, this is just so good and so simple.”
So, he said, “Hey, I just finished my 19th book. And the main character in the book said,” I think he said, “The main character said, “Hey, this is the recipe for a happy life. All you need are these three things.”” He said, “Thing number one, something to do. Number two, someone to love. And number three, something to look forward to.” And Jeff goes, “And I was thinking, yeah, that’s why I’m so happy. All I need are those three things. Someone to love.” And he said, “You,” which meant me, I’m his someone to love.
Something to do which is his job which he gets up and does five days a week and which he has been doing since he was 21, the same job that he’s had so much success at, he’s so good at. And then the third thing is something to look to forward to. And you know what he told me, “A cigar and a little glass of whisky on a Friday night.” That’s what he looks forward to, something to do, someone to love, something to look forward to.
I want you to sit with those three thoughts, that I will call is the key to success, key to successful life. If you know that you have something to do that’s meaningful, meaningful work in the world that you’re proud of, you have something to get up and do every day that you love. If you have someone to love, a person to love, someone to get up every day and to love, and you have something to look forward to. And you know what it is, something in your future that you’re really anticipating that you’re looking forward to.
Those are key to success, a successful life, good feelings, a purpose, a meaningful life. So, Jeff’s key to success is different than my key to success when I answer these three things. So, I have something to do. When I thought about it my something to do is this work that I do, that I love so much, that I created out of thin air when I turned 57. I have something to do that gives me so much meaning. I’m a life coach for women. I help women reinvent their lives in the second half of life. I have something to do, that is so powerful and means so much to me. That’s the key to my success.
And number two, I have someone to love. And I have decided that someone to love is me in the second half of life because I didn’t know how to do it before now. I didn’t know how to put myself first. And it was because I was taught that putting myself first and loving myself was somehow selfish. But now I know it’s different than that. It’s actually the least selfish thing that I could ever learn how to do. The someone to love that I get up every day and practice loving is me.
And you know what that means for me and what that means for other people in my life, the most important other people in my life? It means that I love them unconditionally without any strings attached, without worry that they’re not going to somehow love me back, without worry that they’re going to not give me validation and meet my needs. Because the work that I do to love myself every single day when I get up in the morning, the key to my success, the work that I do to love myself fills me with so much love, so much validation, so much self-approval, so much pride in who I am.
And you know what happens from all of that, from this high self-concept, the strong way of viewing myself, and thinking about myself, and loving myself? Is that I have very clean, healthy, strong relationships with all the people that matter most to me. That’s key number two to success, to a successful life, to being a successful woman in the second half of life. Someone to love is me. Someone to love is you first and foremost, that’s key number two.
And number three, something to look forward to. You know what I look forward to? I look forward to everything in my future, every single thing because I know that I have the power to create whatever I want. I look forward to everything. I look forward to growing, and evolving, and changing every single day. I look forward to, like I envision my highest self, my future self because I know she’s so spectacular and she’s so beyond successful, beyond anything I can even imagine today, she has created for herself. I look forward to all of it.
So, the reason I’m telling you this is because my keys to success for me and Jeff’s keys to success for him are different. And they might be different for you. They’re supposed to be. Jeff’s always been very simple in his needs. He’s very content. He’s very much the same. I know what to expect from him day, after day, after day. He’s not really interested in growing, and evolving, and changing. He’s not interested really in his future self. The language that I speak is different than the language that he speaks. And he’s okay with that and I’m perfectly okay with that.
I didn’t used to be, I used to think he needed a change. But now because of this work I know he’s perfect the way he is. I love the way he is. But it doesn’t mean that I can’t be fully engaged in my own life, in the way that I think about success and the way that I show up every day so excited about being inspired and longing to change. This work is for me and for me alone.
And anybody else that is drawn to it, anyone else that wants to think like I think, and I grow, and change, and evolve because she knows she can but maybe is married to someone like I’m married to who isn’t interested in any of that. I want to tell you for sure if you’re her, you’re right where you’re supposed to be and you’re married to the exact person you’re supposed to be married to. He doesn’t have to think like you. He doesn’t even have to agree with you or validate you. He gets to be him but my friend, you can create any kind of success in your life that you can imagine.
There’s you and then there’s your brain. Your brain thinks that you’re here to please your husband and to make him comfortable and do what he expects of you. But I promise you, that’s not it. He is your person to love but only second to you. You are your person to love. It’s so much easier to love him when you love you. I always say I love and adore Jeff, but I love and adore me more. That’s the secret to my successful marriage. That’s why I’m so happy. So, I’m so happily married to someone who gets to be exactly who he is.
Something to do, something meaningful to do and if you’re in your second half of life, your first half of life may have been spent caring for everybody else’s needs. So maybe you’ve lost yourself a little bit. Maybe you don’t even know who you are. But you can imagine something different for yourself, you just don’t know where to start. I can help you start. I can help you find clarity on that. There is something for you to do in the second half of life. And I’m 100% sure it’s different than what you’ve been doing in the first half of life.
Something to do, number one, the key to success in the second half of life. Something new to do, that’s so meaningful and so exciting to wake up to every day. Number two, someone to love, that’s you. You can put yourself first for the first time maybe in your entire life. Someone to love is you. Learn to love you, be amazed by you, be proud of you, be excited by you. Be madly in love and in awe of you because you’re worth it, you’re worthy of it. You are amazing, I promise. I promise you are. Someone to love is you.
And then the third key to success, something to look forward to. It’s deeper, it’s deeper, it’s deeper than a cigar and a whisky on a Friday night. That’s so sweet and so profound for my husband. And I’m so happy for him that that’s all he needs. But I need something more than that. I need something bigger, and dreamier, and I’m sure I’m going to get it. That’s what gets me up every morning because I just dream big, and I know you’re like me. I know there is something more than that. I don’t mind a glass of wine on a Friday night.
I look forward to crafting a beautiful handmade cocktail on a Friday night, I love that but that’s not my something to look forward to. My something to look forward to is much more magical than that. I think about when I’m 70 and the kind of life I’m going to be living then. And I show up as her now and it’s powerful, and it’s big and it’s beyond my wildest dreams. That’s what fuels me every day. So, I became a swimmer. That’s why my body is getting stronger by the day. I just keep pushing myself. And that’s why I pay big bucks to join in over my head mastermind groups.
And I pay big bucks to hire amazing coaches who make millions of dollars every year because that’s who I am, that’s who I’m becoming. And I want you to be onboard with me. You’re a big dreamer, I’m giving you complete a 100% permission and validation today that that is possible for you. And that is your key to success to be able to think like that. And whatever anyone else is thinking around you and whatever they think keys of success are, that’s exactly perfect for them. But it doesn’t mean that that’s all that you can think, that that’s where you’re limited.
There’s no limits to who you can be, who you can become, how to set yourself up to live the exact life experience that you know is possible for you.
So, the three keys to success for all of us are something to do, someone to love, something to look forward to. I want you to sit with those. I want you to decide what they are for you. And then I want you to remember that every single day and get excited about it. Life is amazing and so are we. And someone said to me yesterday, “The world is just getting worse and worse.” And I was like, “What are you talking about? The world is getting better and better, it is.” That’s the way I see it.
That’s a powerful way to show up in the world every day. The world is getting better and better. And you know what happens when I think like that, and I truly believe it? Is all I find, my world is getting better and better, and your world is getting truly better and better. Your life is getting better and better when you see it that way. Our only obstacle is our brain, is our negative thoughts, and our negative beliefs. That’s the only thing in your way. I can help you shift that. I can help you get rid of those thoughts that are in your way.
The beliefs, the way that you see yourself, I can help you see yourself from a different perspective, a much more positive, empowered perspective so that you can move forward and stop looking in the rearview mirror. Our past will never get us where we’re headed. Let’s be inspired and motivated. And remember what the keys are to a successful life. Something to do, someone beautiful to love, something amazing and powerful to look forward to. That’s it, that’s what I have for you today.
I love you for showing up. If you’re interested in my next group, my next small group, I want you to go to my website kymshowerslifecoach.com. Sign up for my fall group and you will hear from me immediately and you will receive my beautiful Reinvented After 40 workbook and you can get started on that before our group even starts. And your future self will thank you. That thing to look forward to will be your future self, everything that you will accomplish once you sign up for that group.
I promise you, your mindset will shift the minute that you pay the money and invest in yourself and your future self. You will have that to look forward to. Do it for you right now, you’re worthy of it. You’re amazing. Be amazed by you. Take massive action and let’s go on this second half of 2022. Are you in? I am all in. Let’s go. Okay, have the best week and I will see you next Thursday.
Thanks for listening to Reinvented After 40. If you want more information or resources from the podcast, please visit KymShowersLifeCoach.com.
I’m 62 years old and I’ve created a life for myself that blows my mind every single day. I’ve learned how to build a wildly successful business and create a beautiful, strong, healthy body and grow happy, easy relationships with the people I love the most. I’ve become my own inspiration. The 2nd half of life is by far the most exciting & powerful of all. You can have it too.